lol! I think a lot of what ppl get up to while drunk or on drugs could fit into this tier 0 then. You’re having fun in the moment but when your friends tell you later … no
I do a lot of outdoor stuff and am around a lot of people who are verrrrry proud of their Type 2 fun (have only ever heard them in two types but I like this breakout into three). Frankly I find Type 2 fun often very annoying as a concept and in my experience it can be used very smugly by people who can’t just relax and have actual fun lol and need everything to be an insane challenge. Or maybe I’M the smug one because I feel so sure that if people did relax then they could have the regular type of fun even while doing something sort of uncomfortable and wouldn’t have to blowhard about how this will be fun in retrospect (I am definitely the smug one too lol).
Having said all that I think this essay is sooooo sweet and makes me see the whole framework in a much more generous light about how we communicate and make meaning and level-set with each other.
Years ago (5 or 6 maybe?) I surprised my husband with a birthday dinner at a restaurant he loves (which he knew was the plan) where a bunch of his friends and family were waiting to meet him (which he did NOT know was the plan). Every single year since, when I've said, "What do you want to do for your birthday this year?", he has responded, "I don't even care but NO SURPRISES." I wish I had read this essay before that :')
which only breaks it into two categories but delved into more detail on the second. This feels so important to define and pursues these things, especially now when tech is removing all friction from our lives. Friction is uncomfortable but can reveal strength and beauty.
Every word from Molly is worth, as we say in French, her counterweight in 24K. Such a great party game, and since I'm not at a party, I'm now playing with myself. Three tiers of literature: New Yorker cartoons, Nabokov, Nouveau Roman. Three tiers of shoewear: padded Hokas, daisy-chain sandals, those turquoise pumps-with-a-bowtie I teetered on around 2003. Endless possibilities! Thank you, Haley & Molly! (proving your recent point about "ee" named people being more fun) Audrey =)
I personally experience so much tier 1!! I think a lot of parents do. I think that's what makes it so hard to ever wish away...your kids flood you with joy all the time! It feels like falling in love every day. Except it's a shit ton of work lol
Thank you! Curious if you think there’s a constant ratio between the tiers? Or is it ever changing? Like for every tier 1, are there 2 tier 2’s and 3 tier 3’s? Or inverse like 1 tier 3 to every 5 tier 1’s?
I’m going to argue that riding a very intense roller coaster falls into all 3 categories moment by moment. Waiting in line - often 2. The climb to the drop and the drop itself have me questioning all the decisions that led me to put my life in danger so it’s a 3. But then coming out of that drop and the rest of it is all a solid 1.
For me, the tiers are epitomised by different hiking experiences:
Tier 1 - hiking on a beautiful sunny day
Tier 2 - hiking through a biblical storm
Tier 3 - hiking while tripping on shrooms and believing I'm going to die
Exactly perfect
This absolutely correct!
Can something fall into all three categories? If so, my wedding last month fits.
Actually perfect (diff wedding, same triple-dipper)
Tell me more
Awesome. ; )
What about something that is fun in the moment, but not fun in retrospect?
Such an important tier. Tier 0!
Or fun in anticipation but not in the moment.
lol! I think a lot of what ppl get up to while drunk or on drugs could fit into this tier 0 then. You’re having fun in the moment but when your friends tell you later … no
Tier 1: reading Molly Young
I do a lot of outdoor stuff and am around a lot of people who are verrrrry proud of their Type 2 fun (have only ever heard them in two types but I like this breakout into three). Frankly I find Type 2 fun often very annoying as a concept and in my experience it can be used very smugly by people who can’t just relax and have actual fun lol and need everything to be an insane challenge. Or maybe I’M the smug one because I feel so sure that if people did relax then they could have the regular type of fun even while doing something sort of uncomfortable and wouldn’t have to blowhard about how this will be fun in retrospect (I am definitely the smug one too lol).
Having said all that I think this essay is sooooo sweet and makes me see the whole framework in a much more generous light about how we communicate and make meaning and level-set with each other.
You just described most of the seattle dating pool lmao
Yes!!!! I’m in CO so we understand each other haha
Years ago (5 or 6 maybe?) I surprised my husband with a birthday dinner at a restaurant he loves (which he knew was the plan) where a bunch of his friends and family were waiting to meet him (which he did NOT know was the plan). Every single year since, when I've said, "What do you want to do for your birthday this year?", he has responded, "I don't even care but NO SURPRISES." I wish I had read this essay before that :')
Just read this this week:
https://www.shesabeast.co/lets-have-some-type-ii-fun/
which only breaks it into two categories but delved into more detail on the second. This feels so important to define and pursues these things, especially now when tech is removing all friction from our lives. Friction is uncomfortable but can reveal strength and beauty.
Every word from Molly is worth, as we say in French, her counterweight in 24K. Such a great party game, and since I'm not at a party, I'm now playing with myself. Three tiers of literature: New Yorker cartoons, Nabokov, Nouveau Roman. Three tiers of shoewear: padded Hokas, daisy-chain sandals, those turquoise pumps-with-a-bowtie I teetered on around 2003. Endless possibilities! Thank you, Haley & Molly! (proving your recent point about "ee" named people being more fun) Audrey =)
Okay so in my head parenting is mostly 2 and 3, with a sprinkle of 1 ? (I’m debating having kids, have none.)
Is this accurate parents? Or is it way more tier 1? I think I need the tier 1 to keep me going 😆
I personally experience so much tier 1!! I think a lot of parents do. I think that's what makes it so hard to ever wish away...your kids flood you with joy all the time! It feels like falling in love every day. Except it's a shit ton of work lol
Tier 1: Every single time my kids do something cute, or fun, or new. Which is multiple times, every day
Tier 2: Taking the kids out for the day, like to the beach or for a day trip
Tier 3: Attempting bedtime solo with my 2.5yr old and 13mo…
Thank you! Curious if you think there’s a constant ratio between the tiers? Or is it ever changing? Like for every tier 1, are there 2 tier 2’s and 3 tier 3’s? Or inverse like 1 tier 3 to every 5 tier 1’s?
I’m going to argue that riding a very intense roller coaster falls into all 3 categories moment by moment. Waiting in line - often 2. The climb to the drop and the drop itself have me questioning all the decisions that led me to put my life in danger so it’s a 3. But then coming out of that drop and the rest of it is all a solid 1.
Molly’s original tiers commentary has lived rent free in my head for the bulk of my adult life