(71 mins) | This week I invited my favorite people in the world, Kelly and Andy Nahman, my older siblings, onto the podcast to discuss my last newsletter, #30: Intrusive thoughts. We talk about anxiety spirals, insomnia, and the strange neuroses we tend to leave out of small talk. I may be biased because I love my siblings and want to know everything going on in their brains all the time, but this one made me laugh a lot. I do want to warn that our tone may come across as insensitive or cavalier due to the gravity of the topics…so if dark humor isn’t your thing, or you’re not in a place to make light of serious things, this one might not be for you.
Hi, just popping in to say that Maybe Baby newsletter/podcast drop days have been a bright spot during my weeks. It was especially heartwarming to hear the palpable excitement in your voice during this episode w/ your sibs.
Just noticed in the original version that my audio cut out for 15 seconds around 51:45. I'm sorry! Just uploaded a new version but since most of you will listen to the original: For the record I said, "Whenever I think about the fact that humans are wireless, I'm very concerned. How are we self-sustaining?!" Or something stupid like that
Absolute love your content and read/listen every week.
Just wanted to write a quick note to say thank you for talking about intrusive thoughts. What you and your siblings discussed is a small insight into what it’s like to live with OCD. It’s quite normal to have recurring thoughts that scare us (sometimes referred to as “The Imp of the Perverse” after Edgar Allen Poe’s short story) but for those of us with OCD, these intrusive or “sticky thoughts” plague us all day every day and we feel compelled to do compulsions (whether they be mental or physical - “Pure O” refers to only mental compulsions) to ensure these thoughts don’t become reality.
Subsets of OCD can be harm OCD (terrified you may unwittingly harm a love one for example, by having a lapse in judgement when using a knife, say), existential OCD (terrified at the idea of solipsism or not existing), sexual OCD etc. The list goes on. The common thread with these fears is that they attack what you love most. For years, for example, I couldn’t eat my dinner with a knife for the debilitating fear I would accidentally stab someone in my family. I felt incredibly scared and alone. These types of thoughts plagued me from age 8 up until 25 when I finally stumbled across a Redddit forum on OCD and realised what I had been suffering with my whole life, but was too scared to tell anyone about for fear of them thinking I was insane. I had been incorrectly diagnosed with generalised anxiety disorder, when what I really have is OCD.
Anyway I just wanted to write this here in case this resonates with anyone. Please don’t be afraid if this does - you’re not a bad person, your brain just might need a little extra help from a psychologist (and possibly medication) to get back on track.
Listening to this was so weirdly comforting—it's actually very nice to know that other people have these kinds of thoughts all the time? Thank you to all three of you, but specifically to Andy for asking "when do we get to talk about fear of dying young?" which is something I've wondered during the course of several conversations but never spoken out loud.
Haley, listening to you and your siblings talk about your dark intrusive thoughts was such a weird and moving experience. I have such similar thoughts but I'm an only child and I've never expressed the depths of my paranoid anxieties with anyone other than my therapist (and even then it feels like a big step to admit how bad they are). Listening to you guys made me feel like I was part of the fam for an hour or so, among people who would understand me if I told you all my strange and obsessive thoughts. Thank you for that.
I think about dying young all the time, especially because I took so long to follow my passion for art and was heading down a science/more conventional job road for so long. Now that I’m on that track I have a paralysing anxiety about wasting time and dying before I’ve done my best work haha oh god it’s REAL ❤️ Loved this ep, I have a similar dynamic with my 4 siblings (we’re all so neurotic lol) and it made me laugh so much x
I used to watch America's Most Wanted on the cube TV my parents had mounted on their bedroom wall. Thought I was gonna change someone's life by memorizing a license plate.
Listening to you three made me want to FaceTime my brother & sister immediately <3
Ok WOW I love that you guys talked about intrusive thoughts and normalized them. I feel like we (the royal we, that is) all needed that. I also need to second Kelly’s haunting scene you can’t unsee! Mine is also that terrifying hangnail scene from Black Swan. It’s terrible. Also I study behavioural sleep medicine and we have non-pharma treatments for Andy’s insomnia :)
Side note, I need to put it out there: Kelly has the best laugh ever. I hope that’s not weird.
I am a newly paying member (long-time fan!) but I decided to start here today, perhaps because there is nothing that thrills me more than the promise of long discussions about the things that haunt us. This episode did not disappoint. I may actually lose sleep tonight due to second-hand anxiety about Kelly's Botched Zoom Call. Thanks for this dark delight. Also, I may have misheard, but I think you mentioned that you have a dead tooth--a trait that I (and Taylor Swift) also share. My sister, a Swiftie, shared this video with me to help me feel more confident about my "deadtooth." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRg0x9n-Ov0&feature=youtu.be
loved this! I have constant intrusive thougths about getting hit by a car (I bike a lot around my city, so maybe it's a good defense mechanism to be constantly thinking about that??) Also: your siblings seem so fun!
I cannot stress enough how heartwarming this conversation has been for me, despite the sensitive topics. You guys are an awesome trio, and I can understand how you would be afraid of your siblings death, I would be too!
Also, now I really want to see that sheeps tiktok.
Hi, just popping in to say that Maybe Baby newsletter/podcast drop days have been a bright spot during my weeks. It was especially heartwarming to hear the palpable excitement in your voice during this episode w/ your sibs.
Just noticed in the original version that my audio cut out for 15 seconds around 51:45. I'm sorry! Just uploaded a new version but since most of you will listen to the original: For the record I said, "Whenever I think about the fact that humans are wireless, I'm very concerned. How are we self-sustaining?!" Or something stupid like that
Hi Haley,
Absolute love your content and read/listen every week.
Just wanted to write a quick note to say thank you for talking about intrusive thoughts. What you and your siblings discussed is a small insight into what it’s like to live with OCD. It’s quite normal to have recurring thoughts that scare us (sometimes referred to as “The Imp of the Perverse” after Edgar Allen Poe’s short story) but for those of us with OCD, these intrusive or “sticky thoughts” plague us all day every day and we feel compelled to do compulsions (whether they be mental or physical - “Pure O” refers to only mental compulsions) to ensure these thoughts don’t become reality.
Subsets of OCD can be harm OCD (terrified you may unwittingly harm a love one for example, by having a lapse in judgement when using a knife, say), existential OCD (terrified at the idea of solipsism or not existing), sexual OCD etc. The list goes on. The common thread with these fears is that they attack what you love most. For years, for example, I couldn’t eat my dinner with a knife for the debilitating fear I would accidentally stab someone in my family. I felt incredibly scared and alone. These types of thoughts plagued me from age 8 up until 25 when I finally stumbled across a Redddit forum on OCD and realised what I had been suffering with my whole life, but was too scared to tell anyone about for fear of them thinking I was insane. I had been incorrectly diagnosed with generalised anxiety disorder, when what I really have is OCD.
Anyway I just wanted to write this here in case this resonates with anyone. Please don’t be afraid if this does - you’re not a bad person, your brain just might need a little extra help from a psychologist (and possibly medication) to get back on track.
Link here if anyone wants to know more:
https://www.ocduk.org/ocd/types/
Love your work and so looking forward to more! x Briony
Listening to this was so weirdly comforting—it's actually very nice to know that other people have these kinds of thoughts all the time? Thank you to all three of you, but specifically to Andy for asking "when do we get to talk about fear of dying young?" which is something I've wondered during the course of several conversations but never spoken out loud.
Haley, listening to you and your siblings talk about your dark intrusive thoughts was such a weird and moving experience. I have such similar thoughts but I'm an only child and I've never expressed the depths of my paranoid anxieties with anyone other than my therapist (and even then it feels like a big step to admit how bad they are). Listening to you guys made me feel like I was part of the fam for an hour or so, among people who would understand me if I told you all my strange and obsessive thoughts. Thank you for that.
I think about dying young all the time, especially because I took so long to follow my passion for art and was heading down a science/more conventional job road for so long. Now that I’m on that track I have a paralysing anxiety about wasting time and dying before I’ve done my best work haha oh god it’s REAL ❤️ Loved this ep, I have a similar dynamic with my 4 siblings (we’re all so neurotic lol) and it made me laugh so much x
Borrowing "womb crew" laughed out loud.
Avi playing all the intro songs to avoid licensing fees really is killer. Big fan.
I used to watch America's Most Wanted on the cube TV my parents had mounted on their bedroom wall. Thought I was gonna change someone's life by memorizing a license plate.
Listening to you three made me want to FaceTime my brother & sister immediately <3
Ok WOW I love that you guys talked about intrusive thoughts and normalized them. I feel like we (the royal we, that is) all needed that. I also need to second Kelly’s haunting scene you can’t unsee! Mine is also that terrifying hangnail scene from Black Swan. It’s terrible. Also I study behavioural sleep medicine and we have non-pharma treatments for Andy’s insomnia :)
Side note, I need to put it out there: Kelly has the best laugh ever. I hope that’s not weird.
I feel so seen. I didn’t know other people had these thoughts too to the extent I do. What a great sibling group you have.
I really needed and loved this. Bring the siblings back!!
I am a newly paying member (long-time fan!) but I decided to start here today, perhaps because there is nothing that thrills me more than the promise of long discussions about the things that haunt us. This episode did not disappoint. I may actually lose sleep tonight due to second-hand anxiety about Kelly's Botched Zoom Call. Thanks for this dark delight. Also, I may have misheard, but I think you mentioned that you have a dead tooth--a trait that I (and Taylor Swift) also share. My sister, a Swiftie, shared this video with me to help me feel more confident about my "deadtooth." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRg0x9n-Ov0&feature=youtu.be
Def into you + your siblings making morbid conversation cards. 10/10 would buy.
loved this! I have constant intrusive thougths about getting hit by a car (I bike a lot around my city, so maybe it's a good defense mechanism to be constantly thinking about that??) Also: your siblings seem so fun!
I cannot stress enough how heartwarming this conversation has been for me, despite the sensitive topics. You guys are an awesome trio, and I can understand how you would be afraid of your siblings death, I would be too!
Also, now I really want to see that sheeps tiktok.